Pumpkin the Cat Dead at 14

Pumpkin Arrives - October 1995

Anyone who knows me is aware that the family cat (Pumpkin) and I didn’t often get along.  We had a love-hate relationship.  I would torment her at times; she would totally ignore me.  Of course, my main source of tormenting her was forcing her to sit with me when she would rather be anywhere else.

However, each day we did have a bonding moment.  Whenever I would come out of the shower, she would be waiting on the end of the bed wishing to be brushed.  I was happy to do it and was usually rewarded with a purr.

Truthfully though, I saw Pumpkin as an annoyance and would often joke about dancing on her grave when she died.  That was until yesterday.

After a weekend of her throwing up and having loose bowel movements around the house, I took her to the Veterinarian Monday morning to see what flu-like kitty bug she had gotten and how could we cure it.  What I found out 45 minutes later was that her kidney disease they discovered last winter had gotten much worse.   My options?  Hospitalization to bring some of her blood levels back in line, a version of home treatment, or euthanasia.  The Veterinarian’s opinion about options 1 & 2 were that we would buy a few months at best. 

Shocked at the decision in front of me, I chose the decision I had often joked about – let’s put her down.  This is the first time I have ever had to make that decision for a pet.  Making it a bit harder was having my daughters with me – who are off school this week.

About 45 minutes later, after my wife arrived, everyone had a chance to say good-bye, my family left and I was alone with the doctor as we waited for Pumpkin to “fall asleep.” 

 My immediate reaction?  I cried – for many reasons.  I cried because I knew my daughters were hurting.  I cried because I knew my wife was sad.  Despite the many problems we had with Pumpkin in recent years – Ellen was still the one who picked her out of a box when she was five weeks old and decided to keep her.  See, Pumpkin and her brother had been abandoned when they were maybe four or five weeks old and were found one morning on the street under a car by one of Ellen’s employees.  So, Ellen had a major connection that no amount of soiled carpets, chewed up documents, or broken Christmas Ornaments will ever take away.

I also cried because a member of our family was now dead after 14 years.  That deserves crying.  However, the thought that still breaks my heart some 34 hours later, is the feeling that I finally fulfilled my many comments made in jest.  “I killed the cat.”

Could we have done more?  Should we have done more?  I don’t know.  The Veterinarian left it up to me saying she supported any of the three options.  Pumpkin was not well, and she obviously didn’t feel well.  She was very dehydrated.  But I will be left with the knowledge that when I grabbed her on Monday to put her in the cat carrier, she was at her water bowl drinking.

Pumpkin's Last Photo - November 19, 2009

So, in a few weeks I will have her ashes returned to me.  I will have my chance to “dance on her grave.”  Will I?  Yes I will - but not because I am excited she is dead.  We plan to plant a tree next spring in her honor in our backyard.  We’ll put her ashes with the tree – and yes we will dance.  But we will dance to celebrate her life!  14 years deserves to be honored!