Holiday Decoration’s Right to Life

As we move away from New Year’s Day and head back into the normal grind of work and school, it is time to take down the decorations from the holidays.  My wife is a big fan of the holidays, and demonstrates this via the decorations around the house.  While she has many decorations for all of the seasons and holidays throughout the year, by far Christmas is the holiday she loves more than any other.  We have four large boxes of decorations and many smaller ones.  We even have several larger decorations that have their own box and just live on the storage shelves in the basement during the non-holiday portion of the year.

Growing up, my mother would put out her fair share of decorations, but nothing to the degree that my wife does – so this has truly been a unique experience for me during our marriage.  While I know my wife is not fanatical like others, she does OK.  We are at a point where we could decorate three trees.  We haven’t gotten there yet – stopping at two trees the past few years, but we have acquired a third tree from my parents – so we will probably get there in 2010.  In addition to the tree decorations, nearly every table top throughout the house gets a few well placed ornaments / decorations.

Currently as I type this my wife is busy putting the decorations away.  She carefully matches each item up with the original packaging it came in, and then places it in the proper spot in one of the larger boxes.  This process began for about two hours last night and will occupy much of her time today. 

I know many of you are probably thinking, why doesn’t he stop blogging and go help her?  I would, but you have to understand one key fact.  She doesn’t want my help.  My role is simply to carry the full boxes back down to the basement and place them on the storage shelf.  She figures it is the only de-decorating job I can do without messing something up.  And she is probably right.  See, when I was a kid, the majority of our tree decorations were hand-made things with the occasional purchased ornaments.  These ornaments were kept in a brown paper bag you carried your groceries home in from the store.  So when it was time to take down the tree, we would quickly pull off the ornaments and toss them in the bag.  There was no special boxes, tissue paper, foam protection, or anything of the like. 

Didn’t this mean that some ornaments were damaged or broken?  Of course, but in my mind, that was the way to control the over population of holiday decorations / ornaments.  I figured it is acceptable to lose 5% of your supply each year – especially, if like my wife, you are purchasing or making (children school and scouting crafts) new ornaments each year. 

So this is where my wife and I part company in our beliefs.  She believes that every ornament is a special ornament and is protected to the fullest extent possible.  I have called this the Ornament Right to Life Model.  I prescribe to a Darwinian Model of Ornaments that the strongest shall survive.  Unfortunately, my model is not permitted the opportunity to be practiced or tested in my house.  In the past when I have attempted to help, comments have been made that clearly indicate that my assistance is neither needed nor valued.  Basically, my wife has not issued to me a decorating or de-decorating license.  My sole purpose is to put up the tree, make sure the lights work and are strung, and then get out-of-the-way - except for the occasional lifting and moving of heavy boxes.

So, during this time of holiday clean-up, I will be looking for other things to occupy my time.  Anyone know what time the football games are today?